how rude.

"You shouldn't have done that. It was rude."

Uh...yeah. That was the point. 

I didn't do what I did and think to myself... "Wow... you are just the coolest thing since sliced bread."

Okay... yeah I did think that, but it didn't have anything to do with thinking my actions were kind. It had everything to with the fact that my actions were justified in some warped way by my dysfunctional mind. 

 Oh... and... uh... 

"Yes you look fat in that dress."

fish up in a tree.

"Cats shouldn't eat artificially died, foam cranberries."

"That's... profound."

In my short time I have learned that people preach common sense but struggle with actually applying it.

Yeah... I'm talking to you. My muse. My inspiration.

You're great, don't get me wrong... but you're just a fish climbing a tree.

not common sense. 

cheers to you.

I will lie until I get it right.
It might take me my whole life, but I will make it happen.
I will fake it until I make it. I will lie, cheat and steal.
I will make it.
I will be the best.
I can be the only one.
You must be the only one.
We must be the best.
Here, there can only be one, but they expect us to ALL be the one who wins.
You shove your views down our throats.
You drive your children to the brink and then you wonder why.
We are driven to the edge...almost falling. always.
Right as we reach the edge we are given slack and we come back.
People die, people cry.
It ends, it begins.
This place will be the end of us all if we don't get out.
I will get out. I will not allow them to force me to be what they"know" I have to be.
I will be what I want to be.
When I want to be that and I will do it my way.
I will succeed and I will make it, but only because you taught me that it is the ONLY way.
I will lie, cheat and steal to get what I want,
because you told be that that is the only way to get it.
So cheers to you and your screwed up values.
Turn a blind eye and act like you don't see.
We all know that you do.
So cheers to you. 

left alone to die.

running down a dead end street.

 bury me under the rubble.

"The first draft of anything is shit."   ~Ernest Hemingway

I didn't do a first draft.

how to eat cupcake. the right way.

Listen up peeps. Apparently we have all been eating cupcakes wrong.

I know, I know. You are sitting there thinking... "don't tell me how to eat a cupcake. I know how to eat a cupcake."

While yes. I am sure that as a capable human person, you can in fact eat food, but that is not what I am trying to teach you.  I am simply trying to tell you that you are nothing more than a simple-minded fool (join the club) who has no idea how to properly eat a tiny desert. Anyway...if you do not know how to properly eat a cupcake and would love some assistance, keep reading.

1. remove the buttery, revolting outer paper liner and set liner aside.

2. pick up the cupcake. good. we are off to a good start. hold it with to hands, one holding the bottom half and one holding the top half of cake.

3. while keeping the cupcake still, and in place with the hand holding the top, take the bottom hand and twist off the bottom half of the cupcake. good, good, getting better.

4. Now that you have one piece of cake with frosting and one without, set the cupcake half with frosting down on the cupcake liner you set aside.

5. take the last half of cake and place it on top of the frosting, so you have a cupcake sandwich.

Cake, Frosting, Cake. Yum.

6. Eat.

Now we have the perfect "frosting v. cake" ratio in every bite. No more messy faces or fingers... just delicious cupcakes all day.

It's Over.

In a matter of hours I will be in Ohio, running from the New York skyline.

We're All Mad Here.

I hate this place
As Jane Austen so eloquently wrote,
"it is not merely this affair, on which my dislike is founded.
I hate this place.
Tick. tock.
I hate this place.
All hell breaks loose.
"Any words of advice?"
"Stay Alive."
"Thanks."
"No problem kid. Just keep talking."
But if I cry I get another hour. I learned not to cry.
She must have know about the problem with the jewelry box,
but you're not supposed to talk back to grown-ups.
Tick. Tock. Sings the clock.
I hate this place.
This is just someone's memory of life.
A voluntary prison with discipline.
Tick. Tock.
An error: "too much, too soon."
They were sick with horror...
There was no sound.
At this point being crazy is the least of my worries.
The clocks here tell nothing but time.
I hate this place.

God Save The Queen.

Drinking champagne. 

Because I remember the day it ended. 

The day I walked away.

Stars slide down the morning sky to find a place to die.

I will not rest. I am drinking champagne. 

Meant for a wedding. 

A fairytale ending. 

Drinking champagne going by the name of Glitter.

Dancing in circles.

I feel celestial.

  

*Marina*

I Remember.

I remember eating macaroni and cheese while coloring in coloring books.  I remember spending every free second of summer at the pool. I remember all of the homes. I remember all of the schools.  I remember packing.  Lots and lots of packing.  I remember dad picking me up for the weekend.  I remember eating sticks of butter.

I remember doctors, surgery, cops, and you.  I remember you the way I wish I always could.  I remember when you were my everything and no one could ever be bigger or better than you.  I remember when I learned the truth.  I remember when I finally figured out what the saying "ignorance is bliss" meant.  I remember a childhood that I don't remember.

I remember growing up at 6 years old.  I remember going to the movies for 14 years.  I remember being left alone for days while you were gone.  I don't remember where you went.  I remember not eating while I was with you.  Days without food... great parenting.

I remember the day I hated you with such intense passion I thought I would burst at the seams.  I remember the day I learned that my hatred fueled your fire.  I remember the day that I learned to forgive, but never forget.  I remember the day I said goodbye.  I remember what freedom finally felt like.